Actually, I don’t have any idea to write. I just want to practice my writing because I’ll take IELTS simulation test tomorrow (Oct. 5). There will be writing section, so it is about practicing to get the better score🙂
Since my beloved Dad passed away, I still can’t control myself particularly my emotion. I become an emotional person. I don’t like to do some activities as well. I don’t like my lately condition actually but it just comes up. Perhaps, it’s a part of my mourning expression. But, I hope it will end soon.
You know, missing someone you love very much is deeply hurt. I love my Dad so much that’s why I feel hurt so much. The first thing came to my mind when I heard the news was that it’s not true, it’s just a dream (sometimes, I don’t believe it till now). From the beginning I heard the news until I came back to Bandung, I didn’t believe it. I wanted somebody to wake me up and tell that it’s only a dream. Even, at that time I couldn’t distinguish dream and reality. It was really hurt.
And of course I deeply feel remorse. I think I don’t give my best yet to my beloved Dad. I don’t even graduate from my college for Bachelor Degree. I’m so sad. I can’t make him see me using toga and other graduation stuff. And treat him eating “Mie sop” (a local food: boiled noodle with soup and vegetables) which one of his favorite food.
But, you know, as a Christian, I believe that this is the best part that God has planned for our family. I can feel now that my beloved Dad has rested peacefully in heaven with his Creator. Something I learn, take care of yours before they are gone forever.